Recognizing the Hurt

Chaos, fear and anger

hurt6That is how the majority of people view the world today.

Media hype fuel their fears and people have come to find it easy to blame others for the bad things in their lives.

Everyone of us has been hurt everyone of us have blamed our hurt on others and everyone blames past hurts for the way we act or behave today.

Yes we all have some emotional past, yes it hurts but do you need to let that hurt control the rest of your life.

What you do with hurt though is probably more important then the hurt itself.

Why not take control of the hurt and pain, own it, not it own you and get on with your life. You can ruminate endlessly about the past and something that cannot be changed or you can start living again..

Easy to say hard to do, even impossible are reactions I get when I teach others to let go of the past.

hurt5I tell them that to achieve this, they must believe they can and start thinking positively, and not allow negative thoughts to maintain control of their lives.

Blaming others for they hurt we feel today is easy, divorce, deceit and many other wrong doings it is the easiest path,  to blame others and not yourself and you let the hurt own you.

Some of this blame is not even for things done to us but to our relations, our peoples generations ago, yet we still allow these events to rule our lives.

You should not forget or brush aside the wrongs but neither should you hold on to then.

Learn from them lessons so they are never repeated but don’t let them live within you. Put the hurt away be positive and start owning your own life.

The victim

hurt3You as the victim feels good, you are in the right and you are on the popular team, the team that fights wrong doing and hurts of the past whether personal or to one’s community.

But guess what the world doesn’t care about your personal feelings or about wrong doings of the past, yes things were bad, yes lessons need to be learned but also you need to get over blaming others for all the bad of the past.

Yes your voice matters, yes you are special but you must learn a vital lesson, yes your feelings matter but don’t let the truth that your feeling matter be overridden with your feelings should override all else and nothing else matters.

Your feelings are a ripple on the ocean of life, it can be messy and confusing but don’t let that ripple be lost in the ocean.

Take control of your life and become the ocean not the ripple.

Every moment in your life you make a choice. You can go through life allowing the actions of others to govern your life. To start feeling good you must take control and responsibility for happiness and not allow others to be in control of it.

Why do you want to allow a person or event of the past have control of your life now. No amount of analysis has ever fixed a wrong done to you or your community. So why do you want to waste your life trying to analyze everything and letting it control your life.


hurt2To make a change in your life and allow you to bring joy and happiness back into it is to make space for it if your hear remains full of pain hurt and resentment of others for past indiscretions how can  you have room for new positive thoughts and take control of your life.

Things do not just go away, you need to make a commitment to let go of the past.

If you will not or halfheartedly make a decision  to let go you WILL end up self sabotaging any efforts to move on from past hurts.

You need to realize one important factor, you have a choice and only you can make the choice.

Your must stop reliving past hurts done to you or your community.

Stop reliving those hurt in your heads

Start to think positively that today is the first day of the rest of your life and you will be in control, you and only your will govern the rest of your life.


Voice the hurt

An important part of the healing process is to voice the hurt of the past. If you cannot voice it to another person write it in a journal or letter.

Even through it will never be seen you know within yourself you have taken this step to bring the hurt into the open and the first part of the healing process has begin.

Once the hurt is in the open, look at what lessons you have learned from it. Now tell yourself all this was in the past it cannot be changed. Look at each event then put it to rest.

Today is the first day of change, the first day of the new you. the day you took control of your life.


unityNow focus on your goal, a new you in control and positive.

Stop being the victim.

Stop telling  yourself about the past that caused your hurt.

Stop allowing yourself to be sabotaged by the biggest saboteur you know, YOU! yes you are your own worst enemy.

It may help if you create yourself a sentence that you say to yourself when thoughts of the past start to control your thoughts of today.

Something like I am in control of my destiny, not my past.

Remember if your brain is full  of hurt and negativity theirs little room for positive thought.

Negativity =control of you

Positive =Control over negativity, you are your own boss.


hurt1We may not want to forget another s bad behavior or wrongs done to you or your community, but to move forward we must.

The hurts of the past are lessons for the future learn from them so they can never be repeated but let go and forgive the past too.

Only by finally forgiving yourself and others for mistakes and wrongs of the past can you truly be free to take control of your life live a happy future full of positive you owe it to yourself and those dear to you to be happy and full of life.

I know its hard, but forgiving the past is the surest way to a happy future.

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